Miracle

I'm not feeling so well these days.  It never ceases to amaze me how I can actually be jealous of pregnant moms who get morning sickness, but seriously, I am jealous.  How wonderful it would be to wake up each morning, feel like crap for a few hours, throw up, and then get on with my day!  Instead, I feel nauseous day in and day out, never actually "getting" sick, but feeling sick all the time. 

I'm trying to take it one day at a time, moment to moment, knowing that this is temporary...as in finished along with the first trimester (hopefully!).  If this pregnancy follows the pattern of the other three, in only four-and-a-half more weeks, I'll start to feel like myself again; although right now, that feels about as out-of-reach as the moon.

The one thing I keep reminding myself is that this will all be worth it in the end.  I've never looked at any of my biological children and thought, "Man, all that sickness and that restless sleep, having to go to the bathroom eighteen times each night, gaining all that weight that I worked so hard to take off, back pains and swollen ankles and then hours of agonizing labor...and this is what I got?!"

Nope, they placed my baby in my arms, I fell instantly in love,
and none of it ever crossed my mind again.

And I'm sure it will be the same this time.

Hanging onto that promise right now, and also to the thought of the tiny human being God is knitting together inside my body. 

The miracle of it all never ceases to amaze me. 

Yesterday marked our littlest peanut's seventh week of life (from conception: I'm technically nine weeks pregnant out of forty, the way they figure it).  In honor of this milestone, I did a little research (found here):

Week 9: Fingers and Toes form You are in week nine of pregnancy. (seven weeks from conception) The embryo has grown to measure 30 mm (1.2 inches) in length. The fingers and toes are well defined. Cartilage and bones begin to form. The upper lip as well as the nose tip is being formed. The tongue begins to develop and the larynx is developing. The eyelids are developed, although they stay closed for several months. The main construction of the heart is complete. During this week of pregnancy your baby is now swimming round in a little bag of fluid. The arms and legs have lengthened. The fingers and toes are forming, but are still joined by webs of skin. They can flex their elbows and wrists. They are growing eyelids as well as forming their anus. The embryo is protected by the amniotic sac that is filled with fluid.  Inside the embryo swims and moves gracefully. The embryo is now about 1 inch long. During this time of development, the baby's head appears much larger than the body because the brain is growing very rapidly. Brain waves can now be measured.  The main construction of the heart is complete. Through its parchment thin skin, the baby's veins are clearly visible. During this week the ears, the teeth and the palate are continuing to form.

In seven short weeks (at only about an inch long), our baby has a beating heart, brain waves, fingers and toes, and a completely different genetic code from any other human being that has ever existed.  Fully alive, completely unique, being knitted together at this very moment in the image of the Creator. 

Nothing but the hand of God could perform such wonders.

And if being sick and uncomfortable is the role I have to play for the privilege of being part of this miracle, then I will gladly endure it the best I can.  

I just really hope the next four-and-a-half weeks fly by!

Psalm 139:13

For you created my inmost being;  you knit me together in my mother’s womb.