He Really Loves Me

I pray a lot for patience.  I pray for help to get through the day, especially on those I-wish-I-could-go-back-in-time-and-start-the-day-over kind of days.  I ask God for direction, for peace in tough circumstances, for supernatural strength when I have none left of my own.

But that's not all.  I pray for other people, too:  my kids, my husband, our sponsored children, my brothers and sisters in Christ.  Sick people, hurting people, lost people, the persecuted and defenseless.

For as far back as I can remember, though, I have never asked God for any material possession.

Until one night last fall.

Looking at the night sky through the window of our shower (yes, we have a window in the shower), I broke down in tears and asked God if He would consider giving me the desire of my heart: an old farmhouse.  A place with character and charm where we could raise our five kids, and a plot of land where they could roam.  Maybe a crooked barn and a chicken coop and a vegetable garden, with trees to climb and places to explore, and room for my long-coveted goat. 

No farmhouse, in my mind, would be complete without an old tire swing, either...hanging from the branches of a massive, gnarled tree.

I can't say that I asked in detail for each of these things, that I laid out the floor plan of my dream house or was overly specific in my request (especially considering I felt a little weird to be asking for something I didn't "need" in the first place).  But God heard the genuine cry of my heart, saw into my dreams, gave a certain man I love the desire to make his wife's dreams come true, and has chosen to answer in this way:

Wow!  Obviously, I'm more than ecstatic to see my dreams becoming a reality, my wonderful husband is thrilled to be able to buy his wife the house she's always wanted (talk about brownie points), and the kids are nearly shaking in anticipation of occupying all that space!  When I can look past all the overwhelming feelings of organizing, purging, donating, packing, cleaning, repairing, selling and moving, I can hardly wait to see how God is going to grow and change our family in our new home. 

And I'm also learning something new about God.  Sure, He loves it when we ask Him for things we need, like patience and direction and healing and peace.  But just like the feeling of joy I get when my son opens up the "perfect" Lego set on Christmas morning, I think God is delighting in watching me "open" this house.

He really loves me, my Father does.  In spite of all my imperfections, sin, selfishness and pride, He hears my prayers and delights in giving me the desires of my heart. 

God really and truly loves me...and so does my husband. 

And that's better than any old farmhouse.               

Although I'd really like to keep it...tire swing and all.